'geordie' & 'squeak' are Nicked! It's Just not Cricket!

Back in the 1950's to 1970's a lot of lads in ourtold him to look at the top of his apple tree. They
cricket team were farm lads from the surroundingalso put some tar on an outside toilet seat and a
farms. Cricket was a social as well as a sportsvery unfortunate lady got stuck to the seat.
environment for them. Normally they would playThese pranksters needed a comeuppance and they
cricket and spend the time after the match in thegot it one night after winning the local cricket evening
local pub. If they won a local competition they wouldleague trophy. 'Geordie' had far too much to drink
spend a LOT of time in the pub!and was completely legless. 'Squeak' had too much
Our team was a decent village team and they won abut he could still walk. He had the problem of getting
few trophies over the years. 'Geordie' & 'Squeak'his mate home to the farm that was a mile away.
were two of our best players and they certainly"Aha" thought 'Squeak' when he saw a wheelbarrow
knew how to celebrate. One night it got them intoin the farmer's yard where he had painted the
trouble with the local bobby!painted the pig black. "I'll put 'Geordie' in the
They were both farm lads and worked on a farmwheelbarrow and take him home in that" he thought
about 1 mile away from the village. In those daysto himself.
they would walk or bicycle to the cricket games.The villager saw 'Squeak' take the wheelbarrow and
After going to the pub they would sometimes playgot in touch with the local bobby. "I'll teach them two
pranks on the local village residents.a lesson" said the local bobby. He soon caught up
Lots of the villagers used to keep a pig in theirwith them because a mile takes a long time if you zig
backyard, after the war, to get round the rationzag all over the place. "What are you two up to" the
problem. One night 'Geordie' & 'Squeak' crept into abobby asked 'Squeak'. "I'm taking him home"
farm yard and painted a villager's pig black with tar.stammered 'Squeak'. "Are you drunk 'Squeak'"
Next morning he was totally outraged when he sawboomed the bobby. "He's a lot worse than me" said
the pig had been painted and vowed revenge.'Squeak'.
Another villager had their chimney blocked up. There"I'm arresting you for being drunk in charge of a
was a house in the village that was built in a quarry.wheelbarrow" said the bobby. "Anything you say will
It was possible to walk in the field at the back of thebe taken down and used in evidence against you".
house and climb on to the roof. 'Geordie' & 'Squeak'"Me Mam will kill me if you do that" pleaded 'Squeak'.
climbed up the roof and stuffed some straw insideThe bobby could barely keep a straight face! "OK I'll
the chimney pot. It blocked the chimney and sentlet you off this time but if I hear of any more pranks
smoke back in to the living room inside the house.in the village then I'll tell your Mam what you have
The villager was vowing revenge if he found outbeen up to". 'Squeak' finally got 'Geordie' home in the
who the culprits were.wheelbarrow that night but they never played any
'Geordie' & 'Squeak' also tied a gentleman's bike tomore pranks on the villagers after being found "Drunk
the top of an apple tree. He could not locate the bikein charge of a wheelbarrow".
at all and was completely stunned when someone